by Robbin S. Taylor

Ah, yes Valentines Day. Who do I think of when I think of that special day?

Well naturally I think of my 4 loving little guys whom occasionally drive me nuts. And of course I think of my wonderful husband whom at times I fantasize about giving me the entire day off. While actually worshiping the ground I walk on with rose petals on the floor before me, a nice complete body message till I fall asleep and then to wake up to a sparkling clean house with quietly playing children and breakfast on the table. I am mother that loves all that are in my life and that are close to me, no matter how many wrongs they have done against me. But I am also a responsible adult who does my best to organize and keep everything running smoothly within the family. Sometimes I feel like I am glue that holds us all together. That is a good thing, due to that is exactly what my mother was to my first family. I consider this my second family and a different family for lack of a better description. Anyhow my mom she was the glue that held my brothers, father and I together and I never saw it till she was physically gone. It is a shame because when she passed from this world my first family fell apart. When I say that I am not kidding. We literally fell apart. I tried to fill her shoes and hold us all together through phone calls and such but with all my effort I just could not do it. We separated all of us and started to literally grow apart. Emotionally, mentally, and physically, it was not until 3 years ago that we all finally started to find a way to get to know each other again, when I moved back home into the house I grew up in and my how we have all changed.

I feel closer to my mother here. For a long time I did not come back because I was afraid and I was not truly facing her passing. I knew inside I had goals and dreams and a husband and children and I still was not whole, complete. I felt something was missing, and I thought that something/someone was mom. So I moved back here to be closer to her. As time went on I think I have learned more about love and being a mother a good mother from my mothers passing then anything I have ever learned from experience and or from other mothers. What is that, that I have learned about love from my mother leaving me so young and the glue falling apart in my first family? It is that love, is not just with mom, it is with the family and the old saying goes and is so true. If you love something set it free (My brothers, father, mother and myself all were set free upon moms passing.) If it comes back it was yours it was love. If it does not it was not yours and love was never a part of it. We all came back together. Mom might of left physically but her glue- (the love) remained! Thanks mom, for the one lesson and huge hug that I so desperately needed most all my life.

I am now a 32-year-old work at home mother (graphics artist) with 4 beautiful children and a truly wonderful husband. A fantastic father, terrific brothers, and a very wonderful mother whom remains in my heart and teaches me still something new everyday.

Thank you all! Happy Valentines Day!

Robbin S. Taylor
Infinite Dreams
Graphics Artist
artist4u@zoomnet.net

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