Spiritual Kids

What's the Silver Ring Thing All About?

It's About Guys, Girls, Dating, Love, Second Chances and the Best Choices!

Real life questions and answers about sex. Silver Ring Thing uses sketch comedy and music videos to make the abstinence point.

The facts. Silver Ring Thing is THE sexual abstinence program that makes sense for 21st century teenagers. It gives you an alternative to the increasing pressures you face to have sex without consequences.

You'll hear why sex should be saved for marriage. Get solid answers to real life questions like . . .

• What's the big deal about sex?
  
• Why should I wait?
  
• How far is too far?
  
• What if I haven't waited?
  
• Can I start over? Is there a second chance?
  
• How do I stand up to all the pressure to have sex?

Silver Ring Thing for Parents

Experts agree that parents play the most effective role in establishing their children's sexual values. Parents are the primary sex educator in their child's life. But what do you say, and when? How do you raise a standard in your home while the rest of the world is trying to tear it down? How can you deal with the shadows of your own sexual past? The Silver Ring Thing for Parents offers timeless answers and foundational truths for parents who want the best for their kids.

The Silver Ring Thing is preparing your child to make a commitment to sexual abstinence until marriage. The symbol of that commitment will be a silver ring worn until your son or daughter's wedding day. But how will they navigate the next five to ten years of sexual pressure? Your partnership, your encouragement, and your participation in their lives will be one key to success.

The Silver Ring Thing for Parents will address:

• The role of parents in abstinence
• Defining family standards about dating, sex, and intimacy
• Minding the media - looking at the cultural messages andh ow to diffuse their power
• The benefits of postponing dating and providing dating alternatives

• Roundtable discussions
• Information feedback from parents
• Meeting other parents for future support opportunities
• Viewing parts of the actual Silver Ring Thing Program
• Participating in the Silver Ring Thing vow and pledge ceremony

How Do I Bring the Silver RingThing to My City?

As cities have become interested in the Silver Ring Thing, a national deployment program has been initiated. In the next three years (2001-2004), 45 U.S. cities will bring the SRT program to theirc ommunity. Over 40,000 teenagers will put on the Silver Ring and sign an abstinence pledge. Your city can participate in this exciting sexual abstinence program. The steps below describe the process:

12-Step SRT City Deployment Plan

Contact the SRT national office to receive a packet of materials and video.

Visit our website www.silverringthing.,com for additionalinformation.

After reviewing the materials and budgets, form a small SRT team in your community to develop local interest and ownership.

Plan a trip to visit a SRT live program with your team members (10 weeks prior to our event).

Invite a SRT staff person to visit to plan a SRT program in your community (8 weeks prior).

With help from the SRT national staff, determine a short and long term strategy to create a sexual abstinence "movement" inyour city. Select a location for the SRT event (6 weeks prior).

Order your rings, follow-up materials and brochures, paydeposit (6 weeks prior).

Focus on fund raising and recruitment plan for students, parents and volunteers (5 weeks prior).

Tentatively schedule a date and location for a second SRT program in your city approximately two months after the initial program.

Follow the 4-week marketing, communication and procedure plan with checklists developed by the national office (4 weeks prior).

Complete travel and housing arrangements for SRT travel team, 2nd payment (3 weeks prior).

Complete miscellaneous projects; present the Silver RingThing Program (3-0 weeks prior).

What's the Public School AssemblyProgram?

The Silver Ring Thing presentation team focuses on the number one issue today's teens face - sex and relationships. SRT presents the reason why abstinence until marriage is the best choice to make. By weaving inspiration with information, the students are challenged to make th epositive choices that will make abstinence a reality in their lives.

The message of the Silver Ring Thing is one that NO student can ignore. The team "earns the right to be heard" through their peer-level messages and their high-tech presentation. Students immediately connect with the team and the message. While most media messages today encourage sexual experimentation, our quality high-tech andhigh-energy program presents compelling reasons for students to make a strong stand for abstinence.

The SRT assembly is a great "stand alone" program or an ideal addition to any existing health curriculum or abstinence program.

We also offer an extended option to students, which is, in essence, the key piece to the entire program. If they wish, any students may choose to participate with other teens from the area in a weekend SilverRing Thing program. At this event, they learn more about abstinence and its positive benefits. At the culmination of this program, the students are offered an opportunity to make a commitment to remain abstinent until marriage. Recent studies have proven the effectiveness of this type of pledge to significantly delay first time sexual activity. With this decision, they receive the symbol of this program - a SILVER RING, follow-up materials, and accountability support through one-on-one, peer groups, and the Silver Ring Thing website.

If you are interested in obtaining more information regarding the Silver Ring Thing or have any questions, feel free to e-mail us at info@silverringthing.com

The History of Silver Ring Thing

Silver Ring Thing (SRT) sexual abstinence program was created by Denny Pattyn and the Youth FORUM SouthWest leadership team in1995. The program was designed to attract the attention of the typical 21st century teenager and offer them protection from the destructive effects of America's sex obsessed culture.

In 2000, Denny joined the John Guest Team as the Executive Director and with him brought his vision for the Silver Ring Thing program. It was here that the national SRT program was developed.

The Silver Ring was designed by Paul Bensel Jewelers of Yuma and is worn as a symbol and reminder of the abstinence pledge. The"Thing" in Silver Ring is the high-tech presentation that makes this program uniquely attractive. By featuring awesome lighting and video systems, hilarious skits, concert sound systems, high-energy music, TV's, computers, and a faith-based abstinence message, students become interested in the message being offered to them about their sex lives. In the first five years of operation, nearly 1000 teenagers completed the two-hour program, received a silver ring and signed an abstinence vow.

As other cities have become interested in the Silver RingT hing, a national deployment program has been initiated. In the next three years (2001-2004), 45 U.S. cities will bring the SRT program to their community. Over 40, 000 teenagers will put on the Silver Ring and sign an abstinence pledge. Your city can participate in this exciting sexual abstinence program. Contact us at info@silverringthing.comfor more information.

Answers to the Most Frequently Asked Questions

Q. How old do you have to be to attend a Silver Ring Thing?

A. High School and Middle School students are invited to attend the Silve Ring Thing, as these are the years during which they are forced to make decisions about their sexuality.

Q. How do you talk about sex without becoming graphic?

A. At a SRT program, we are careful not to speak in"graphic" terms for three reasons, (a) the age differences in the room, (b) this is basically a parent's role, (c) this kind of information is better explained one-on-one and not in a group setting. We focus instead on the emotional, mental, and relational results of engaging in pre-maritalsex.

Q. Do you involve parents?

A. We offer a special seminar and support groups for parents. Parents are also welcome to view any part of the program presentations. SRT staff is always available to answer parents' questions, or to address any special concerns. Parental support is vitalto the success of the program.

Q. What happens to students whose parents are not standing behind them?

A. We recognize that not ever student is fortunate enough to have a supportive parent who is involved in his or her life. For many kids the information they receive at an SRT program is the first really healthy and positive information they have ever received about their sexuality. For these kids, the SRT follow-up program, with one-on-one mentoring and peer group support offers an essential alternative to parental support.

Q. What about kids who are already sexually active?

A. We address this question in the Second Virginity message which speaks directly to the issues and problems that sexually active students have encountered. We recognize the fact that many students who attend the SRT are, or have been; sexually active and they need to know if it is possible to begin again. The answer is YES YOU CAN START OVER and, in fact, for this reason many students attend our program.

Q. What happens after you sign the pledge? How do you deal with temptation?

A. Once a person puts on the ring, the second phase of the Silver Ring Thing begins. It is a rare thing for a person not to be tempted, and we want the SRT to be available whenever it is needed. The silver ring and the abstinence vow are a critical first step. Ourongoing support includes follow-up materials, peer-group activities, one-on-onementoring, an accountability partner, SRT website, and e-mail or Instant Messenger access to SRT advisors.

Q. Who runs the SRT program and who is behind it?

A. The national office of SRT is in Sewickley, Pennsylvania where the Silver Ring Thing is part of the national outreach of the John Guest Team (See History). Local programs are run by community leaders and parents groups.

Q. What kinds of people are on the Silver Ring Thing Team?

A. Silver Ring Thing program is presented by a high-energy group of talented young people who possess an exceptional ability to relate to middle and high school students. Specific training in communications, leadership, drama, presentation stills, and technical support is provided by experienced adult staff that constantly monitors the quality ofthe presentations and the message being conveyed.

Q. What do you do to make the evening exciting and keep everyone interested?

A. Humor and technology are the two main vehicles used for communicating the message. Humor is used to get everyone comfortable about being there and talking about sex. Humor is also used to make a point. Comedy skits explore the ways teens relate to each other and the careless way they make decisions about their lives and their sexuality. The kids may be laughing but they get the message that there has to be a better way.

In addition, a vast array of technical equipment is used to present the program. The Speakers and actors are supported by special effects, lights, cameras, and televisions. Teens are drawn to this"cool" club-like atmosphere which they associate with the types of activities they normally enjoy. Our goal is to attract their attention by using comparable or even better equipment, and maintaining a high level of enjoyment while presenting the message of sexual abstinence and purity. The technical piece helps us "earn the right to be heard."

Q. Does the SRT really work?

A. Yes, it really works, but change doesn't come easily. The SRT program only succeeds where parents, schools, churches, youth leaders, and, of course, teenagers, commit to working together to change the future.

Q. Where does all the high tech stuff come from, and how expensive is it?

A. The SRT program is dependent for its success on its high-tech format. For communities interested in launching a SRT program, three different high tech packages have been developed. Contact the Silver Ring Thing National Office for assistance and for details about pricing.

Testimonials

"The 3 friends I brought had the time of their life. We all took the ring and were PROUD of it!!!! " - Jon, 15

"Silver Ring Thing was an awesome experience. People always notice my ring and I love to tell them about it. " - Emily,16

"I think SRT is really great because it gets people to know what God has to say about sex. Before . . . I just thought that it was ok; I didn't even know that it was wrong before you were married. " -Katie, 12

"This is the most relevant abstinence program fo rtoday's generation. " - Kent, 24

"The people up there really know what they were talking about. It wasn't some 49-year-old health teacher. I liked the energy that everybody had. It is an awesome program with an awesome meaning." - Kate, 17

"I had a blast at SRT!! It was so much fun!! Just to let you know - this silver ring has made my life so much easier!" - Meredith, 14

"I loved it! It answered a lot of questions I had." - Rachel, 13

"It's been fantastic! It is really important to me as a parent on all the levels... the spiritual level to the physical level. I am so proud of my kids for making this pledge." - Piper, parent of 2 teenagers

12 Step Follow-Up Program

Making a decision to remain sexually abstinent until marriage is a strong stand to take. It is not a one-time decision. It is a decision that has to be re-confirmed almost daily as a young person goes out into the world and experiences pressure and temptation. Many men and women will wait until they are in the late twenties or early thirties before they decide to marry, and yet they may become sexually mature at 12 or13 years old. To remain sexually abstinent for 17 or 18 years is a challenge in any society.

SRT recognized that making a pledge and putting on a ring is only the beginning. Very few people can remain true to their pledge unless they have strong individual and group support. For this reason SRT has created a 12-step follow-up plan.

TWELVE STEPS

The Ring - symbol and namesake of the SilverRing Thing. The ring serves as a visual reminder for the person who wears it, and sends a message to everyone who sees it. Students can seek out other people who wear the Silver Ring and know that they are in good company.

The Vow - promise to remain abstinent made personally by each student, signed, and dated and kept as a reminder.

SRT Bible - abstinence study Bible with support material specific to students. The Bible is to be used for personal inspiration and is the basis of ongoing group bible studies.

A Faith Decision - in accepting the ring, the student accepts the reason for wearing it. The ring is worn because the student understands that God has a plan for his or her life, and a plan for his or her sexuality. When the decision is faith based, the student knows that they are never alone.

A Youth Group - Every student who attends an SRT event is invited to become active in a local youth group.

One-on-One With a Youth Leader - SRT encourages the student to establish a one-on-one relationship with an appropriate youth leader.

Peer Group Critical Mass - As the SRT program expands, students become part of an ever-growing peer group who will strengthen each others' commitment.

Accountability Partner - Every student is asked to name an accountability partner of the same sex to encourage, share, and supporttheir decision.

Website - Our website www.silverringthing.com offers in-depth support, information, and other contacts.

Leadership Opportunities - Allows the student to enter into a leadership training program.

E-mail/Instant Messenger (info@silverringthing.com)- SRT Team members initiate e-mail contact with students and are available for support, advice and encouragement.

Group Dating - Weekend activities for male/female interaction in a group setting
 

Teen Pregnancy - Just the Facts

(Facts and figures from the Center for Disease Control and the National Campaign to Prevent Teen Pregnancy - September 2000)

• The United States has the highest rate of teen pregnancy, birth and abortion in the industrialized world. Problems relation to teen pregnancy cost taxpayers over $7 billion per year.

• More than 40% of American girls become pregnant at least once by age 20.

• Half of all single mothers on welfare were teenagers when they had their first child.

• Less than one third of teen mothers never finished highschool.

• Nearly 80% of the fathers of babies born to teen mothers do not marry their babies' mothers. On average these fathers contribute less than $800 annually in child support.

• Children of teen mothers are twice as likely to be abused and neglected as are children of older mothers.

• Children of teen mothers are more likely to do poorly in school, more likely to drop out of school, and less likely to attend college.

• Girls born to teen mothers are 22% more likely to become mothers as teens themselves, and sons of teen mothers are more likely to end upin jail.

• More than 50% of 8th graders and 80% of 12th graders have tried alcohol. One third of 14-21 year old girls, who became pregnant, reported that they had been drinking when they had sex.

• 70% of teenagers reported that lack of communication between a girl and her parents is the reason teenage girls have babies.

• Eight in ten girls and six in ten boys who were sexually active say that they wish they had waited until they were older.