Feature Article

Ways to Spend Mom's Time Out
by Barbara L. Hearn

If mom is not a happy camper, the day gets off to a bad start. All of the planned activities are doomed, unless Mom changes her tune. And it influences everyone.

Mom is the head of the household. How she feels, acts and thinks reflects on her family. It's a tough job. Despite the complexity of her job description, Mom manages to accomplish the feat with amazing grace.

There are numerous hats to wear. When being a wife is no longer one of those roles, her life alters drastically. Suddenly she is single again. Things are different. Instead of having a family to look after, the structure changes significantly. It requires adjusting to the new balances within the family unit. It is an immense process.

With everything in life, comes change and change is good. You have to roll with the punches and keep up with what life throws at you at its different stages.

Mom desperately needs a separate identity and life. If your child is a teenage boy like mine, you never see them anyway. Either they are off driving around with friends in your car (you shudder at the thought) or scouting out the town on the skateboard. Both activities of course involve risk and you worry. The hardest part of being a parent to a teenager is loosening the reins of control ever so slightly, but not to entirely let go. The transition is not easy on either end.

Having children is indeed a blessing and a life long endeavor. And with every aspect of life, Mom needs and deserves a break Why not make this the perfect time to pick up a new hobby and strike off in a different direction! Link up with old friends and go to places you have never been before! Start actually engaging in what you have been talking about doing all these years!

One of the positive things about having a teenager is they are not so dependant on you for everything. There's no stopping you from discovering new things. With more time on your hands, the opportunity is just staring you in the face.

You have to put yourself first every once and a while. And that really is essential, as well as crucial to remaining a healthy, stable Mom.

I haven't had a difficult time with this assignment.

What really is relaxing to me is checking into a nearby hotel (about 15 minutes away) and spending the night away from home. I limit myself to this luxury twice a year, once in the Fall and Spring. If I stay home, I feel obligated to keep myself busy, when I should be relaxing. I venture to the hotel when my son is out of town visiting his Dad or spending the night with friends.

Once I check in, I enjoy reading. I conquer all of the reading material I never seem to get around to at home.

I love exercising too, and if the hotel has a treadmill (I try to book one with an exercise room), I work out for an hour. It makes you feel better and it's beneficial to your health.

I treat myself to a mouth-watering lunch (most recently Red Lobster) before checking in. After indulging on the fabulous shrimp and cheese biscuits, my car steers itself to the stores where I can find the best bargains and sales.

Less than 24 hours and several snacks later, I'm refreshed with a good night's sleep. It's a terrific way for me to get my battery energized for another round of life.

I check in at specific hotel chains because I can earn points for nights. As soon as you reach a certain number of points you have earned a free night's stay if you choose that option. You can also redeem points through either gift cards to designated restaurants or stores. So if you travel a lot, your points will start adding up real fast. So makes a free night's stay even closer!

I also enjoy writers' conferences. Usually it's just a couple hours drive from home. It proves invaluable for me to just think and relax in silence while driving to my destination. These trips are also well worth it, because I have the opportunity to meet other writers. From these trips I'm not too far now from having enough points for a free night's stay!

Meditation is another outlet I have discovered which relaxes me significantly. I find myself always on the look out to try something different and new. Meditation proved to be the ticket and has really worked for me. What a sensational way to unwind and relax your mind, body and muscles at the same time! In this hectic-paced world, everyone is entitled to some peace and quiet! It was heaven for me while it lasted!

If you're not crazy about spending a lot of money, check out the free activities and events your community has to offer. I know my city has several newspapers free to the public available at the library and other locations. Packed inside are ideas for fun day trips or destinations or for even longer. You don't have to spend a fortune just to have fun! Sometimes the best low-key outings are out from the city away from the hustle and bustle.

Being single and over 40 doesn't mean you have a valid excuse now for lounging in your bathrobe in front of the television! On the contrary! Use this new chapter of your life to be a woman on the go!

About the Author: Barbara L. Hearn and her 15-year-old son, Dale, live in Nashville, Tennessee. Barbara has enjoyed writing poetry for almost 20 years. She has written over 250 poems, some of which have been published. She is a member of the Tennessee Writers Alliance. The rest of the family includes two cats, Two and Smartt, and hedgehog, Spike. She can be reached via e-mail @:blhkimp@comcast.net.